Is it just me who has broken my resolutions already?

OK, I know what you are thinking. Why am I talking about New Year resolutions when it’s February? I’ve got it all wrong. December is all about breaking up from work, stuffing yourself silly, drinking yourself silly, staying up late, getting up in the light (so late), and effectively re-enacting the Mannequin Challenge by showing how many hours you can lie on the sofa immobile watching the boxsets.

Then we get to January and it’s all about deprivation, while registering with every recruitment agency we can find and telling ourselves this year we will have the career we were meant for. We aren’t allowed to eat or drink, (is there a worse phrase than “Dry January?”), we are expected to only spend our money on gym membership and lycra, otherwise save, and we’re back to work, with all manner of new year resolutions in tow.

But February, when we get to February at long last is when we’ve forgotten about the resolutions and moved on, right? February is about wondering whether we’ve escaped the worse of the winter weather and debating how many more days until we leave work in some even vague semblance of light at 5.30pm.

So why am I mentioning resolutions and pulling us back into bleak January? I’m curious to know whether I am the only one who thinks these are month long or not. In January it is serious; you mean business. By now, well, Spring is meant to be round the corner so you’ve moved on.

So, my new year resolutions? Well, it depends whether you are someone who takes it all seriously and then gets to the 5 January and declares yourself a failure, or someone who says what’s the point, doomed to fail etc etc. I’ve done both, but this year opted for somewhere in the middle.

The first one is I want to lose weight. Cue eye-rolling! Yes, hardly a new one. I could opt for the 3-4 stone otherwise I fail first option, or I could go for the second option of if I’m lighter than last year, it’s a bonus and I’ve succeeded. But this means even half a pound lighter and I’m successful but really I’m fooling myself. So, I’m going for the middle option; I am working hard on losing some weight each week with the hope that by spring and summer I will start to feel better about myself (and have less of a fear of mirrors!) but still expect more weight loss to go. How’s it going? Well, up and down. Lost some but gained some when winter first came in, so not quite there yet. Although I will say after spending a small fortune on a private dermatologist to get my skin clear, I am determined not to waddle round Rome in May feeling disgusted with myself.

Next resolution? I said I would write my next book. I have started but to be honest it’s slow going. Not content with procrastination I have booked myself onto many online courses in an effort to make my brain work a little bit harder. I’m enjoying adult learning, but it does rather take up the hours when I should be writing.

Getting rid of my third credit card. Here I have been successful. Next pay day sees the last of my card paid off and already I feel elated to be free of it. Next year the Amex is going the same way!

I also said I was going to save money. Ah, well, perhaps you didn’t see my Is it just me or does anyone want to join AA? Amazon Anonymous post. Veto this one! Not going so well.

Not getting stressed, was the final one. Mmmm…can I veto that one as well?! I decided staying in control of my stress levels was staying in control. It lasted about three days. I was doing fine until I returned to work. The combination of adult unfairness of being back to my desk, mingled with unreasonable customers and dark mornings, made me fall off this wagon. I am striving to get back on, but at the moment in all this fog it’s an effort to even find the wagon!

I suppose all this proves is that I’m human and I should probably focus on the first half rather than the ‘still to be achieved.’ For now I shall just have to accept being flawed!

#NewYearResolutions #2017 #Hopes #BeingGood

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